I'm Not Glass
by karebear90
Summary: Hermione's parents were killed by the Dark Lord, now Harry won't talk to her, Ron has a drinking problem and hermione has her own problems to worry about.. COMPLETE
1. Tenderness and Damage

She closed her eyes for a moment _"What have I done?" _

"What did you say?" A cold voice said.

"N-nothing." Her voice quivered.

"You dare say no to me." The cold voice continued.

"I am sorry, please."

"No you should have thought." The cold voice slipped his hand under her shirt and to her breasts."

"Draco please don't." Her voice shook.

"Shut up, you're filthy anyway." Draco whispered while pushing Hermione against one of the classroom walls he had captured her in. Hermione was meant to be at dinner she was on her way back from studying late in the library. Mr Draco Malfoy had always tormented her ever since first year. But in the past two years he has secretly become abusive towards her. Hermione couldn't tell anyone afraid of the consequences she would have to deal with later; Draco would always threaten if she told a soul he would kill her because he had the power too. Since her parents were killed by the dark wizard and Harry has stopped speaking to her plus Ron is too busy with Lavender, Draco had convinced her no one knows of her existence. In other words no one would notice that she was gone.

Hermione had to cover he scars and bruises everyday to keep their little secret. Hermione has been constantly avoiding the library to only going once a week and staying in the common room apart from going to classes and meal times. Even during these times Draco would find her, he always does.

Draco had neve sexually abused her before, this would be the first time. This time Hermione didn't know what to expect this time and she was scared.

Draco ran his hand down to her jeans and undid the button and slipped his hand in. Hermione pulled away.

"Draco, please don't."

"Draco, please don't." He mimicked her. "Come here." His voice was hard and rough. He pushed her hard into her wall cause Hermione to gasp in pain. Again he reached down to her pants and slid his hand in.

"That hurts." Hermione told him. "Stop."

"Shut up." He pushed his finger in harder to cause her more pain. Hermione pulled away.

"You bitch." He yelled and pushed her back in the wall he raised his hand, created a fist and punched her in the stomach cause Hermione to fall to the ground.

"Slut." He murmured as he spat on her. He walked out of the room after he kicked Hermione in the stomach leaving her Hermione curled in a ball and crying.

Hermione slowly got up and made her way to the Gryffindor common before reaching her destination she ran into Harry or at least someone who looked like Harry sitting at the portrait of the fat lady hunched over.

"Harry." Hermione said in a soft voice, she didn't want to talk loud otherwise it would hurt too much. "Harry." Her repeated, only this time half as softer. "Harry."

"What." He snapped. Hermione was taken aback.

"Harry are you… are you drunk?" Hermione asked trying to speak louder but she couldn't.

"A little." He paused then continued when he saw the look on Hermione's face "Look Hermione I don't need a lecture from you ok I am a _big boy_ I can look after myself I don't need you to tell me off ok… not now." Harry said stumbling up to his feet.

"A little? Harry you can hardly walk." Hermione whispered. Harry was surprised by this time Hermione would be yelling at him, but she is doing the exact opposite.

"What's wrong with you?" Harry asked as soon as he made sure the wall was supporting him and saw the way Hermione was standing.

"Period pain." Hermione said really fast. "Harry I think that we should get you up to bed."

"I tink so too." Harry agreed. Hermione uttered the password and they made there way in and up to Harry's room. Hermione got Harry into bed fully clothed.

"Harry, why don't we speak anymore?" Hermione asked and she sat on the bed holding her bruised stomach.

"We talk… aloot." Harry slurred his words.

"No Harry, not like we used to." Hermione sighed.

"Hermione I don't… want to talk… about this when… I'm pissed." Harry rolled over to his side. Hermione got up and walked around to the other side of the bed and sat down facing Harry.

"Well when the bloody hell do you wanna talk about this? Cause you never want to talk. You make excuses and you run away from me; you avoid me when I want to see you. Harry I can't take it anymore it's like your excluding me from your life and I miss you so much." Hermione said tears forming in her eyes.

"Hermione please… not now." Harry pleaded.

"Fine whatever." Hermione got up fast only to fall down to the floor in pain. Holding her stomach curled into a ball Hermione yelled out in pain.

"Hermione wha's wrong?" Harry asked as he stumbled out of bed and crouched down next to her.

"Ahhhhh Harry it hurts, it hurts." Hermione cried out in pain.

"Hermione wha do I do?" Harry panicked. Hermione just cried. Harry picked Hermione up very badly and walked her down to the common room there were first graders present but no one he new to help. He made his way out of the common room and stumbled all the way to the hospital wing.

"Madam Pomphery." Harry yelled very unclearly making a racket as he cam in knocking over a medical table with equipment on it. Again he repeated the healer's name. "Madammmm…"

"Yes, yes I heard you the first time Mr Potter." She seemed quiet annoyed.

"Somefing is wrong wif Hermimme. She pasted outt." Harry said.

"Yes I can see that, Mr Potter have you been drinking?" The healer asked.

"Nope." Harry said shaking his head like a three year old.

"I am disappointed in you. Put her down over there and you see that stool?" She said pointing over at the wall."

"Yesssssss." Harry answered.

"You are to sit there."

Harry did what he was told and five minutes later Dumbledore walked into the hospital wing and came and sat next to him.

"Drink this Harry."

"Wha is it Sir?" Harry asked.

"Helps you to become sober." Dumbledore said. Again Harry did as he was told because he new he was in big trouble. Dumbledore waited a few seconds until Harry became sober before asking. "What were you thinking Harry?"

"About?" Harry said coolly.

"Don't be cheeky Harry, you know exactly what." Dumbledore said.

"So what I got drunk, who cares." Harry said standing up defending his honour.

"Sit back down young man. You may be 16 but that gives you no right to turn up at school drunk and talk to me that way, now sit down." Dumbledore snapped. Harry sat down.

"I don't know what I was thinking stupid I just guess." Harry said.

"Ok now that we cleared that, what's happened to Hermione?" Dumbledore asked.

"I don't know the whole time she was with me she was hunched over holding her stomach, I asked her what was wrong and she told me it was period pain." Harry said.

"Its not period pain." The healer said walking into there conversation.

"What's wrong with her?" Harry asked as both Harry and Dumbledore stood up.

"She has had a beating."

"What?" Harry asked stunned.

"Someone has surely laid into her, pretty badly I might add. There freshly new bruises on her stomach and old ones on her arms and legs."

"What?" Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, unless she can tell us where every bruise is from there is no doubt. She should wake up soon."

"Can I go and see her?" Harry asked.

"Sure." She said.

"Harry." Dumbledore said.

"What?"

"My office tomorrow morning." Dumbledore smiled.

"What for?" Harry asked.

"To receive your detentions, goodnight." Dumbledore left leaving Harry with his mouth opened.

Harry walked over to Hermione's bed and sat down on the chair next to her until she woke.

"Hermione you're awake. What happened is it true did someone really beat up?" Harry asked.

"What? No course not." Hermione covered.

"Then where did you get all those bruises from?" Harry looked over her.

"What bruises?" Hermione suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"They bruises all over your body, Hermione your stomach is blue." Harry reached down to hold Hermione's hand only to have her pull away.

"Not true." Hermione looked up at the ceiling tears in her eyes a sort of bitterness in her voice.

"Not true? Take a look for yourself then." Harry said. There was a moment's silence. "Then you explain to me why you have bruises everywhere." Harry continued and Hermione didn't answer. "Hermione you collapsed right in front of me in pain."

"What do you care?" Hermione bitterness fell though her voice.

"Hermione I care, I care a lot. Hermione we are best friends…" Harry was cut off.

"Best friends Harry… best friends." She repeated herself, she was a little annoyed by his comment. "Harry best friends are together they talk to each other, and not as a hi, by thing, you barely even do that." Hermione looked at Harry he didn't want to go into this conversation again she could see it in his face.

"Hermione I don't think…"

"You don't think it's the right time to talk about this. Well when will it be the right time Harry uh?" Hermione asked as Harry got up.

"Look your fine right? Well I am just going to go." Harry said turning his back on Hermione.

"What go? Harry please don't." Hermione's voice had changed.

"Well why should I stay all we ever do is end up fighting." Harry proclaimed.

"Because I don't want to be left alone!" Hermione looked up at the ceiling again, lifted her head then smacked it down on the pillow trying to chock back her tears. Harry walked over slowly to his seat and sat back down. After a moments silence Hermione spoke up. "It's really embarrassing." She giggled. "I am the biggest cults there is. I fall over my own feet in fact. The bruises that are on my stomach are from falling off a ladder in the library onto the back of a chair. Pretty stupid uh?" Hermione lied.

"Ouch, kinda yea." Harry had a smile on his face then started to giggle. "Really?" He asked.

"YES." Hermione snapped. "It's not funny."

"Well yea you have to admit it is a little." Harry giggled on.

"Well yea I suppose." Hermione looked away thinking if only he new the real reason.

A moment or so passed. "So how have you been? Apart from all the falling over you have been doing." Harry asked.

"Not too bad, you know I miss my Mum and Dad…" Hermione paused. "And you Harry."

Harry looked away. "Hermione don't." Harry said in a soft voice.

"Harry…" Hermione sat up facing Harry slowly, her feet off the bed. "What has happened, why have you left Ron and I?"

"Hermione I…" Harry looked away.

"Harry look at me." Hermione put her and on his face making him look at her. Tears filled his eyes. "Hey come on please." Hermione said, Harry pulled away from her hand got up moved closer to her and embraced her in a hug.

"I've missed you too." He whispered in her ear.

A/N what do you think? Please review because I won't write for invisible people.


	2. The bargain

Harry pulled away from her hand got up moved closer to her and embraced her in a hug.

"I've missed you too." He whispered in her ear.

* * *

­­"_His back." _Hermione thought with delight. They broke away from one another, Hermione stared into Harry's eyes for a moment and saw the gentle child that she once met five years ago and then in one blink it was gone and Hermione's heart sunk.

"Hermione I have to go, I… promised Ron I'd help him with his homework." Harry moved backwards.

"Harry that's ridiculous I help Ron on Saturday nights, why would you help him on a Friday night when he doesn't have the answers for you to copy?" Hermione proclaimed.

"That is a really good point so I better go and ask Ron why I am helping him." Harry said walking very fast out of the door.

"Harry." Hermione yelled after him but he didn't come back. She lied back down and got under the covers only to hear the door open again. "Harry?" Hermione said.

"Hell No, if I were that twit I'd have to personally kill myself." Malfoy's cold voice entered Hermione's ears giving her goose bumps all over. "I thought he'd never leave." Malfoy continued and kissed Hermione on the fore head.

"Get off me." Hermione snapped and sat up.

"Oh why do you be like that I am only being friendly?" Malfoy sneered. "So how long are you in here?"

"Till tomorrow, I'll be sore for a couple of days thanks to you." Hermione said with bitterness to her voice.

"Oh is that all, next time if you disobey me I'll put you in here for a week. And remember if you tell a soul your dead." Draco whispered in Hermione's ears giving her one more kiss on the head and leaving.

* * *

Hermione didn't sleep the whole night and after convincing Madam Pomphery that she wasn't beat up and told her that she is a cluts she was allowed to go. Hermione finally made it to breakfast after she was bathed and dressed in her weekend clothes. She sat next to Ron who had a mouth full of bacon and eggs when he said hello and sat across the table to Harry who picked up the Daily Prophet the moment she sat down. She served herself bacon and eggs surprising it looked good after seeing Ron eat it.

"How are you feeling this morning after your big night?" Hermione said to Harry.

"Bloody awful." Ron answered. "Fred and George were right, eating greasy foods do help a hang over."

"What?" Hermione asked.

"Yea I know it's bad, it's true I haven't stopped partying yet I am having too much fun." Ron continued.

"Ron was Harry with you last night?" Hermione sweet voice entered Ron's ears, this just told him to run.

"Yes I was with Ron last night ok." Harry said over the Daily Prophet.

"Harry why? You were the one helping Ron getting over his partying ways." Hermione whispered to Harry leading over the table while Ron was falling asleep in his chair.

"I gave up." Harry claimed.

"Some friend Harry." Hermione growled looking at Ron who was falling off his seat now. "Your forgetting something Harry, not only were my parents killed so was Mr Weasley, Ron is hurting and the only reason why he is drinking…" Hermione stopped. "Harry where are you going?" Hermione asked as Harry got up.

"Dumbledore's office." Harry said. "I got caught last night for drinking, do you remember?" Harry said coldly as if that was meant to mean something to Hermione. He left in a hurry leaving Hermione with a sleeping Ron.

Five minutes past until Hermione was greeted with a familiar face.

"Ginny how are you." Hermione asked with delight.

"Not to bad." Ginny said in a low voice. Ever since Mr Weasley's passing Ginny had changed a lot, just as much as Ron. Although Ginny and Ron were the only Weasley children living at home Mrs Weasley was un able to pay her house bills and they had to move out. They couldn't find anything cheap enough to rent in the wizarding world so Mrs Weasley had to file for a small apartment in the Muggle world and she now works as a check-out-chick at k-mart.

Harry offered Mrs Weasley his house after everything she had done for him but she said 'dear Harry, my boy I couldn't take the one thing that you have in life away from you.' And when Mrs Weasley's mind is set there's know point trying to change it. Harry made sure that Mrs Weasley new that she and all her children were welcome there anytime.

"That's good." Hermione answered, a moments silence went past.

"Well I got to go." Ginny said walking away. "Bye." She waved.

"Bye." Hermione repeated.

Hermione was quite worry about Ginny's state of mind, she was worried she had started harming herself after her fathers death. Ginny would always where long white shirts under her school uniform covering her arms and on weekends (like today) she would always where long shirts or in this case today she was wearing big black arm skivvies since she was wearing a black sleeveless shirt. Everyone is in pain Hermione was trying her hardest to help them but it was hard, they don't talk to her, well Ron does in the morning's when he is recovering from a heavy night and on Saturday nights when she 'helps' Ron do his weekly homework. Harry on the other hand doesn't speak to her that often it's only on rare occasions that he speaks to her; like last night. And her and Ginny were best friends they told each other everything, now is only just a hi, how are you? And bye. The only time Ron speaks to his sister is in the holidays; Hermione guessed. and the only time Harry and Ron speak to one another is probably when they get drunk together, on the field and when Harry is copying Ron's homework, the homework he copy's from Hermione. _"Everything is so screwed up." _Hermione thought as she pushed her food away and left Ron asleep in the floor.

* * *

Hermione walked though the corridors fast, her arms were folded her head was down and her heart was beating hard. She was scared, she was scared of a certain someone. She turned a corner and because her head was down she bumped into a familiar person.

"AHHH." Hermione screeched.

"You 'right?" Neville asked.

"Yea I am sorry Neville you just spooked me." Hermione laughed.

"I ain't that scary am I?" Neville joked.

"No your not, hey listen I have been meaning to talk to you, how are you doing?" Hermione said with sympathy in her voice.

"I'm alright, I'm doing fine it was Gran's time to go. I get to go and stay with my Aunt… she's nice… but a little nutty you can tell she is my Gran's daughter." Neville joked and Hermione laughed. "I do miss her on days… but she always prepared me for the day… well you know. She said that she always wanted to dye with dignity. She would away say 'the only way I am going to die is in a fight with the dark lord and give him hell for my babies' and she did if it wasn't for her we wouldn't be here." Neville said scoffing back some tears.

"I know." Hermione said patting him on the back.

"Anyway enough about me, how about you?" Neville asked.

"Suprisly I am good, I got to say good bye and I was so proud of my parents for finding us."

"Yea that was amazing Hermione, and the way your Dad jumped on his back, its like he wasn't scared at all." Neville commented.

"Yea I love my Dad, he was always brave. You know why he jumped him though right?"

"Cause he didn't like the look of him." Neville joked. "Sorry." Neville corrected his joke.

"No, he jumped on him because I was next… the Dark Lord was pointing his wand at me. My Dad saved my life and sacrificed his own and you know what his last words to me he said 'fight Hermione' and then he was gone… then her went after my Mum." Hermione said.

"I am sorry Hermione I didn't realise you saw." Neville said.

"Well I did and at that moment I never felt so lost in my life and I felt that I had no point going on, and if it wasn't for my Dad saying those words I don't think that I would be here today." Hermione said. "Your Gran died for you, Mr Weasley died for his children, Mr and Mrs Potter died for Harry and my parents died for me. I never new how loved I was un till they were gone." Hermione tear a tear roll down her face.

"Hey come here." Neville said hugging her and patting her on the back.

"And because of that man that evil man so many people's lives are so screwed up its not far." Hermione said braking away from Neville.

"Your talking about Harry Ron and Ginny right?" Neville said.

"YES." Hermione yelled.

"Okay no need to yell." Neville said.

"Sorry. Anyway I need to…" Hermione stopped and saw a familiar face that she had regretted seeing. Malfoy walked passed and winked at Hermione giving her chills down her spine. He then spread his index and rude finger over his mouth and stuck his tongue out creating a vulgar insult. "I need to go to the Gryffindor common room to do my homework do you want to come?" Hermione asked hoping the answer would be yes.

"No I can't I am off to Hogsmeade I am craving sugar, I just came back from visiting my aunt… it was her fourth wedding… Gran use to say that women was a hooker with all the males that she has. Any way she has had me on a diet, I swear will go crazy if I don't have sweets." Neville said walking in the opposite direction Hermione was going in.

"I have sweets up stairs." Hermione quickly said.

"No its ok, I am meeting up with some friends later anyway." Neville said.

"Oh ok." Hermione said looking down at the floor.

"Anyway I'll see you later ok?" Neville said.

"Yea ok." Hermione answered and within a flash Neville was gone.

* * *

Hermione's heart sunk and started pounding again. She walked faster and faster until she was pulled into an empty classroom.

"Hi Herm." Draco whispered in her ears strangling her from behind and let her got.

"What do you want?" Hermione said.

"I think you know what I want." Draco said gracing his hand over her face only to have Hermione pull away.

"Well your not gonna get it." Hermione protested.

"Well, as long as I don't get what I want you are going to suffer." Draco sneered.

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.

"Well you do it with me and I leave you alone for good." Draco said.

"What?" Hermione asked again.

"You have sex with me and you get your life back." Draco proclaimed.

"No." Hermione said.

"No? I think that's a pretty good deal… don't you think?

Hermione thought for a moment.

* * *

A/N: Wat do you think?? Thank you to my reviews… I would like more so please review or ill stop writing… I am known to have done that before with other stories that I have written. And trust me if you don't review you won't see what happens. 


	3. Truth Behind Drinking

"No? I think that's a pretty good deal… don't you think?

Hermione thought for a moment.

* * *

"_No." _Hermione thought. "NO." Hermione yelled out.

"No… very well then." Draco's cold voice appeared. He moved closer to Hermione, evil was written across his eyes. He lifted his hand and slapped Hermione hard on the face. "Reconsider my offer." Draco said as he left the room.

Hermione let out a breath; she didn't even know she was holding in. She stood up straight and took another breath before leaving. Hermione made it safely to the Gryffindor common room and up to her bedroom. She looked over herself in the mirror that was hiding away in the corner with clothes upon it. She dropped the clothes off and onto the floor. She had lost a great deal of weight from missing meals because she was scared that Draco would beat her up to and from the Great Hall. She had bags under her eyes because she was unable to sleep properly afraid of Draco some how getting into her room and raping her while she sleeps. She rolled up her sleeves revealing her bruises that he had made by grabbing her all the time. She rolled up her shirt revealing the bruise that he created last night and she rolled up her skirt revealing the bruises from where Draco tried to rip open her legs. Now Hermione had another mark to hide the side of her face was red, she pulled her hand up over it, and it was hot. Hermione let out another breath after another until her breathing became out of hand and she burst into tears. She fell to the floor holding herself repeating two words over and over again.

"Fight Hermione."

* * *

Hermione spent the whole day in her room crying and crying until she couldn't cry anymore. She had to go down to the common room to help Ron with his homework. He would always meet her at 6 a clock every Saturday night. She gathered her books and walked down to the table in the corner next to the fire place. Ron was late it was 6:15 and he still wasn't there. Hermione started gathering up her school books to have an early night when someone sat down next to her scaring her so much she screamed.

"Shit Harry you scared me." Hermione yelled.

"You said shit." Harry was surprised.

"So I said shit what else is new?" Hermione said.

"I have never heard you swear before." Harry stated.

"Well you wouldn't your never around." Hermione said coldly.

"Don't start this again." Harry groaned.

"Whatever… what are you doing here?" Hermione asked.

"Ron couldn't make it, so I have come to fill in for him." Harry said with a cheesy smile on his face.

"You mean so one of you has the answers." Hermione corrected him.

"No." Harry said while looking away.

"Liar." Hermione new when Harry was lying. "Let's get started." Hermione sighed.

* * *

Hermione explained every answer that Harry had and had every question answered. She kept on putting her hair on her face to hide what Draco did to her.

"Ok that's it." Harry said closing his book.

"That's it." Hermione repeated suddenly there was an awkward moment.

"You know the other night… I don't get drunk on a regular basis." Harry finally spoke.

"Oh?" Hermione questioned.

"Yea… I don't know… I go down to this place every now and then have a few drinks with Ron…" Harry said.

"Ron…"

"Yea that's where he is now." Harry confessed.

"Oh… so drinking is better than receiving good school marks?" Hermione snapped for a moment. "Wait a minute. You and Ron are underage for drinking, how can you get in?" Hermione asked.

"Well… we sneak in…" Harry said scratching his head.

"YOU WHAT?" Hermione yelled.

"Shhh keep it down." Harry hushed her. "Guess who works there?" Harry asked.

"Who?"

"Fred and George." Harry smiled. "They get us in through the back all the time…"

"What about their joke shop?" Hermione asked.

"Oh yea they still have that… they only work at Hillers at night… they have the joke shop during the day… the extra money they say… to give to Mrs Weasley." Harry voice became low and quickly changed the subjected. "So I was wondering whether you would like to come down and have a look?" Harry asked.

"What?" Hermione sounded surprised and Harry didn't know if it was a good sound or a run for the hills sound.

"Would you like to come to Hillers with me? I won't leave you alone." Harry smiled.

"You're asking me to come with you?" Hermione asked her face lightened up.

"Yea." Harry smiled back at her. "But you might wanna change out of your skirt though… there will be a lot of dancing."

"Ok… give me a minute." Hermione said before gathering all her books together and rushing up to her room.

* * *

Harry had waited merely five minutes when Hermione came down the staircase. She was wearing tight dark blue jeans, a thin, tight long sleeved jumper, with a dark blue shirt underneath and nice black high healed shoes. Her hair was tamed it was dead straight and for a brief moment Harry thought Hermione was somebody else. He liked this look on Hermione… she wasn't so hidden. Hermione walked up to Harry with a big smile on her face.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Yea…" Harry said dazedly while looking her up and down. "I like what you are wearing." Harry complemented.

"Thanks… I just looked at what you were wearing. Dark blue shirt and jeans… I didn't want to seem like an out case." Hermione said.

"You could never be an out case." Harry said, took her hand in his and walked her out.

* * *

"Hey Hermione… I was wondering when you would be here." Fred said as he saw Hermione as he opened the back door for Harry.

"Hi to you too Fred." Hermione said as she walked in.

The music was blaring… the place was packed… there were a lot of people under the age limit to drink alcohol and there were over five hundred people in this place.

"It's really crowed in here." Hermione yelled to Harry a little bit of terror in her voice.

"Come here." Harry yelled grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the bar to where George was working. The bar went right around the room… and in the middle was the dance floor. The live band was smack bang in the middle of the area and on either side were places where you could sit down or have a table. "Sit here for a moment." Harry said lifting her a little to sit on the vacant stool to the bar whilst standing behind her because all the other stools were taken.

"Hermione… I was wondering when you would be here." George yelled.

"That's funny… your brother said the exact same thing." Hermione yelled back.

"HA' HA' HA'RR'Y." A voice said patting Harry on the shoulder.

"Jerry how you going? Still drunk?" Harry asked.

"Ma'ke tat a we'ek an' a haf now." This drunken person said to whom Hermione didn't know of. "No, no, no, no, no to'day is Saturday righ'?"

"That's correct." Harry said.

"Ma'ke tat twooo week now." Jerry said and stumbled away.

"Who's he?" Hermione asked.

"His a regular." George butted in.

"Oh."

"So what will you have Hermione? A twist, an owl, a Professor… we have muggle drinks to you know…"

"Sorry George Hermione doesn't drink alcohol." Harry interrupted.

"I think I'll have a Professor please George." Hermione spoke for herself while Harry just looked at her stunned. "What? I can drink too you know." Hermione said Harry put up his hands in defence.

"Alright… well I'll have the usual… a twist of oliveander." Harry nodded.

"Alright… a twist of oliveander and a Professor coming up." George said as he waved his wand and two bottles appeared on front of them.

"How much do I owe you?" Hermione asked.

"Nothing… because I am an employee… all my friends and family are free." George smiled.

"That's awesome." Hermione said. "No wonder why Ron comes here all the time."

"Hey Hermione what happened there?" Harry said pulling her hair back behind her ear and revealing a bright red mark.

"I... knocked into a door handle." Hermione lied. "Little old silly me."

"Yea." Harry said; he new she was lying.

* * *

The night progressed well. Hermione got chatting talking about everything and anything really… Harry even scored the stool next to Hermione and the had been sitting there for about three hours.

"George another please." Hermione said lifting up her empty bottle.

"You got it Hermione." George smiled to himself, waved his wand and another bottled appeared on the bar in front of them.

"Hermione… don't you tink… you have hand enough?" Harry asked Hermione being a little drunk himself. "Another one over here George." And Harry's drink appeared before him.

"No… Haven't you." Hermione laughed and she fell off the seat towards Harry.

"Watch it Mione." Harry said catching her and pushing her back on the seat, while Hermione just laughed.

"Harry mate… old buddy… old pal… what's new…. This place is off the hook tonight…" Ron said dozily leaning on Harry, holding a smoke. "See that chick over there?"

"Yeppo." Harry said taking another swing of his drink.

"I'm gonna get some lovin tonight." Ron said while making a thrusting movement onto Harry's back."

"Oi dude… don't do that… control your self for her mate." Harry said moving away from Ron causing him to fall on the ground in fits of laughter. He finally crawled away laughing to himself.

"Smoking Harry? Having sex I don't mind about the drinking but…" Hermione had tears forming in her eyes. Harry looked over at George; he was upset too at seeing his brother so messed up. Harry on the other hand was strong but it kill him inside to see his friend in that state.

"I know Hermione, I know." Harry said pulling her into a one arm hug.

"He didn't even realise I was here." Hermione stated. A moments silence went pass. "Another on over here George."

"Right you are Hermione." And another drunk appeared.

"Geor…" Harry started but before he could finish a drink was already in front of him.

"Thank you." Harry and Hermione said in unison.

A few moments went past when Harry finally spoke. "So you wanna dance?" Harry droopily.

"Why not." Hermione yelled.

Both Hermione and Harry grabbed their drinks. Hermione took Harry's hand while he guided her onto the dance floor. They started dancing in an orderly fashion in between taking mouth fulls of their drinks, when they were finely finished with their bottles Harry walked back to the bar and place them upon it. He came back to her and placed his hands on Hermione's waist. Hermione placed her hands on Harry's shoulders. The music became slower and so did their movements. Harry moved Hermione closer to him; they were close enough that they could feel each others breathing patterns. Hermione's heart starting beating faster as they became closer and closer. Hermione felt Harry's pelvis thrust into her as they moved their hips together with the beat of the music.

The music became faster but they stayed at the same speed, until Harry picked up the pace a little. Hermione and Harry looked at each other with lust in their eyes. Both Hermione's and Harry's breathing pattern increased as well as their body temperature. Harry un zipped Hermione's jumper and revealed the dark blue shirt she was wearing and pulled her closer to him. Hermione's hands wondered Harry's body, up and down his back slowly until reaching his sides, Hermione dragged her hands down to his belt and un tucked his shirt. She slid her hands underneath onto a warm chest giving Harry goose bumps. Harry closed his eyes and quivered for a moment, he opened his eyes and saw Hermione looking at him giving him a sexy smile saying she was happy with herself, having accomplished making Harry hard. They thrusted into one another, while Hermione put her head on his shoulder; she was comfortable and Harry held onto her with great protection. The music became faster, Hermione lifted her head and looked at Harry, she moved her hips along side the music and Harry was having trouble keeping up. Hermione just laughed until he got the hang of it. She felt his erected penis though their clothing and Hermione let out a little moan while Harry placed a little kiss on her neck. Hermione responded and moved her neck closer to receive another one and after a while Harry was sucking on her neck while Hermione enjoyed it. The music cut out and so did their heated moment both Harry and Hermione stood away from one another whilst listing to the over voice "Everyone this has been a great night and I am afraid that al good nights must come to an end. It is now mid night. Feel free to order what you want but everyone must be out of here by twelve-thirty. That is all and good morning" the music cut back on but Harry's and Hermione's heated moment didn't.

"We better get goin" Harry suggested.

"Yea." Hermione agreed as she pulled her jumper together and crossed her arms.

"Do you wanna get some drinks for the road or what?" Harry asked.

"Oh, yea." Hermione said as they walked back over to the bar which was fully crowed.

Harry got George's attention and mimed what he wanted and two large bottles appeared in his hands and gave one to Hermione. Harry and Hermione waved thank you and good bye to George making their way back to the door they came in. Harry saw Fred and he came over opening the door for them.

"Saw you too on the dance floor you guys were getting it on." Fred teased while Hermione walked out embarrassed and Harry put his hand up saying shut up. Harry heard the door close behind them after they said good bye to Fred.

* * *

Hermione and Harry walked through Hogsmeade, Hermione a metre in front of him the whole way. They made there way into dark school grounds when Harry said.

"Hermione stop." Harry yelled in front of him and Hermione did. "We need to talk." Harry continued his sentence.

"Well guess what Harry? I don't wanna talk. Does that sound familiar?" Hermione asked.

"Yea it does but… we can't let what happened tonight go un-discussed." Harry said walking towards her.

"Harry we were drunk."

"I know that… but Mione we may have been drunk… but we're not stupid." Harry said stoping right in front of her.

"Drinking makes you do stupid things." Hermione heart was beating hard again.

"No… drinking brings out the truth." Harry whispered to her, he put his drink on the ground and took Hermione's out of her hand and put that one on the ground.

The moonlight was shining and Harry could see the glisten in Hermione's eyes. He placed a hand on her face and moved closer. Hermione breathed in and breathed out again. She moved closer to Harry as well, she placed a hand on his lower stomach and pulled him closer. Harry tilted his head slightly and softly pressed his lips onto hers for a moment and broke away, he did it again and broke away. Harry looked into Hermione's eyes and he could see them clear as day. He ran his hands down her side and too her hips while Hermione placed her arms around his neck. Harry pulled her hips towards his un till they were touching. Harry softly placed his lips on hers again but this time he didn't let go. Hermione spread her lips a little allowing him to enter; he did so very slowly; Hermione agreed with this and entered his mouth too. Their breathing became rapid while they picked up speed. Hermione started walking backwards until she hit something solid; it was a tree when Harry opened his eyes for a brief moment. Their temperature was rearing; Harry lifted Hermione so that she was on he tipi toes. Hermione broke her lips away from Harry to gain some breathing back and soon started tracing kisses from his neck to his mouth. Harry's hands had wondered from her hips to her back to her hair. Hermione un zipped her jumper and Harry slid it off. Harry slip his hands slowly back to her hips until Hermione put her hand in his and place his hand underneath her shirt to her breast and left his hand there. Harry soon after quickly took his hand out and placed it safely on her hips again.

"It's ok." Hermione whispered breathless.

And Harry slowly made his way back to her breast and fondled with it until her nipple became erect. Hermione pushed her head backwards and Harry placed kisses on her neck, Hermione let out a moan which Harry like, it made him feel like he was doing the right thing. Hermione jumped on Harry spreading her legs, while Harry used the tree behind him to help him keep Hermione up. Hermione could feel his erect penis again while his hands explored Hermione's lower back under her shirt. Harry found Hermione's mouth again while Harry let out a moan. A light shone in there faces causing them to break away from one another and causing Harry to drop Hermione.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE." A voice yelled at the Hogwarts students.

* * *

A/N Again… tell me wat you think… I only got one review… (Thank you) I am sorry to say that I might make the next one the last chapter if I don't get more reviews. What's the point of writing if no one reads it??? 


	4. Walking away

Harry found Hermione's mouth again while Harry let out a moan. A light shone in there faces causing them to break away from one another and causing Harry to drop Hermione.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE." A voice yelled at the Hogwarts students.

* * *

"_Oh shit McGonagall." _Hermione thought.Harry helped Hermione to her feet and looked in to the eyes of their professor.

"It is almost one am what the hell are you too doing out this late and where the hell have you too been." Professor McGonagall said.

"Well…" Harry piped up but that's all he could say.

"Yes well…" McGonagall repeated both Harry and Hermione were lost for words.

"Well Professor… You see… Hawee and I were in Hogsmeade shopping… and we lost track of time." Hermione tried to cover up her drunkenness.

"Well Miss Granger I think that you too would have noticed what time it was when the stores closed and mid night. But that wouldn't matter you had to be in the school at Ten at the latest. But I think you too should go to bed now and sleep all the alcohol that you too have consumed and be at Dumbledore's office first thing tomorrow morning. Good night." And with those words she a walked towards the front gates of the school.

* * *

Hermione went straight to bed that night without saying another word to Harry, she didn't know if she was embarrassed or confused she hadn't figured that one out yet and whether is was a good thing or bad thing. What if Harry only decide to take her tonight was to have a good time and use her? What if he didn't really like her and wanted to get into her pants? What if… what if he turns out like Draco??? Only wanting one thing. These were all possibilities that ran through Hermione's head as she lay down to sleep that night.

* * *

The head masters door opened and Harry wasn't there, Hermione was all alone. A friendly face came to the door.

"Please come in Miss Granger." Dumbledore said. "Shut the door please."

"Sir, Harry's not here yet." Hermione said as she walked in and closed the door.

"I know… he came and seen me earlier, please take a seat." Dumbledore said pointing to the chair on the other side of the table as he sat down on his. "You were drunk last night right?"

"Yes." Hermione answered.

"And you came into the school yard intoxicated is that corrected." Dumbledore asked.

"Yes."

"Well I can't do anything…" Dumbledore said.

"What?" Hermione was confused.

"Because it's not my body that you are hurting… I can't do anything if you get drunk and go to Hillers, all I can give you is a detention and that's it but wether you understand the full consequences is another story. However you did break the school rules and you did break the law, so you can't go un punished." Dumbledore said and Hermione sighed. "You, Harry and Ron will be spending today with Hagrid." Dumbledore stated while Hermione had a big smile on her face as soon as he said Hagrid's name. "Helping him with…" Dumbledore said looking at his day planner. "Poison-pork's, half poison ivory, half pig." This statement made Hermione's smile go down.

"Sir, why is Ron having detention with us?" Hermione asked.

"Well… Ron gets really waisted, that's the word you kids use today right?" Dumbledore asked while Hermione asked.

"Yes."

"Well Ron can never seem to find his way back here so Professor McGonagall goes and get him every Saturday." Dumbledore sighed.

"Can you get rid of Hillers Sir? They have a lot of underage people there every night."

"Well no can't because Hillers is only meant for people over seventeen… they don't know that there are underage people in there. So I can't do anything. They are a legal pub for adults so I can't do a thing." Dumbledore said. "Now go and have some breakfast and report to Hagrid straight after."

"Ok… Well bye." Hermione said as she got up and walked to the door.

"Oh and Hermione… don't ever let me see you in here again for this reason." Dumbledore smiled at her.

* * *

Hermione could here the cutlery on the plates and she could smell the pancakes as she was about to turn the corner to the great hall for breakfast until she felt a familiar grip on her shoulder forcing her backwards in to a broom cupboard.

"Hey slut… I heard you got it on with Harry last night." Draco said running his hand under shirt.

"Don't." Hermione said ripping his hand away.

"Awe what have you got to be like that? Uh?" Draco whispered in her ear. "So have you thought about my proposition?" Draco said.

"Yes I have thought about it… and I say NO. Now let me out of here." Hermione pushed on his chest.

"You ain't getting away that easy… I haven't hurt you yet. Hold on give me a minute." Draco said as Hermione heard him crack his back. It was dark in the broom cupboard and Hermione didn't see it coming Draco hit her hard on the head with something causing Hermione to fall backwards and pass out.

By the time Hermione woke up Draco was gone and she felt a trace of blood slid down her face. She opened the door to see if anyone was there and dashed to the bathroom across the hall. She cleaned herself up and made her way to Hagrid's.

* * *

"Hermione I was 'ust bout goin to send a search part'e for ya." Hagrid smiled as Hermione appeared in his door way.

"Hagrid do we really have to… to… to… help you with those things?" Hermione asked grumpily.

"No I thought tha we would 'ust hav some tea… have't seen ya all for a long time… and the on'ly way to see ya is through detention… wats happen there?" Hagrid asked as she sat down next to Ron who was falling asleep, Harry hadn't said a word to Hermione since the episode last night and Hermione was getting a little worried.

"I don't know Hagrid… I don't know." Hermione said with her head down, she had looked at Harry and it felt like she wasn't in the room, he didn't even noticed she was there.

Finally the day ended and they were free to go to dinner. Ron had woken up around mid day and decide to play exploding snap with Harry while Hermione and Hagrid had little discussions over tea, most of the time Hagrid would say "J'ust like old' times aye." Hermione would have rather the Poison-pork's than having tea with Hagrid all day, that way she could have gotten off early and went to the hospital wing.

* * *

Harry, Ron and Hermione left and started walking up to the castle Ron and Harry chatting away like old times and Hermione left with her thoughts. She wanted to talk to Harry but she didn't. She didn't want to know that it was just the alcohol talking. And she didn't want to know that he was sorry for leading her on and she didn't want to know that it was a one timer thing. She wanted to know that it wasn't the alcohol talking she wanted to know he wasn't leading her on, she wanted to know that she had the permission to hug and kiss him all the time. But most of all she wanted to know one thing she didn't care about anything else… she wanted to know wether he loved her.

* * *

They made there way to the great hall but Hermione stopped Harry before he went in, Ron didn't realise, all he noticed was the food on the tables.

"Harry we need to talk." Hermione said in a low voice.

"No we don't." Harry said as he turned around but Hermione put her hand on his shoulder spinning him around once more. "Look Hermione… you were right last night it was the alcohol talking, I am sorry I was leading you on, it was a one shot thing I won't happen again… I…I don't feel for you in that way." Harry said sliding her hand off his shoulder and to her side as he walked away from Hermione.

The three things that Hermione didn't want said were said, and the one thing she wanted most wasn't said. Hermione put her hand on her heart as she watched Harry's back walk away from her. There was a bump in her thought the size of a golf ball, her heart was pounding, her stomach felt sick and her eyes filled with tears. She walked away too, she walked to the Gryffindor Common room very slowly hoping Draco was around to make her feel the pain she was feeling on the inside, but for once he wasn't there. She made it up to her room hopped into bed and cried herself to sleep.

* * *

Hermione finally made it to breakfast the next morning, Harry wasn't there and of corse Ron was. Hermione sat next to Ron he was asleep in his scramble eggs. Hermione smiled and sat down hard to wake him.

"I'm up… I'm up." Ron sprang into action.

"Hi." Hermione smiled. She thought this was rather amusing.

"Hi." Ron said in a low voice.

"What?" Hermione said in little giggle.

"What the bloody hell did you do to Harry last night?" Ron questioned.

"What?" Hermione asked.

"Well after you said to him 'we need to talk' he has been funny." Ron said.

"Uh? You heard that?" Hermione asked.

"Hermione I may be stupid but I am not deaf." Ron stated.

"Ronald Weasley you are not stupid… arr just lazy." Hermione corrected him.

"So what did you do to him… he hardly ate a thing at dinner… he didn't drink with me and I think he was crying in his bed! But I decided that he had the sniffles." Ron said picking up his fork and eating the scrambled eggs he was sleeping in.

"I didn't do anything." Hermione protested.

"Mmhm… then you explain why I had to drink alone."

"Maybe because it is a school night. Ron I think you should see someone." Hermione said eating an apple.

"I am, Doreen she is off the hook. I met her on Saturday night." Ron said all excited and Hermione decide not to ruin Ron's happiness but suggesting that he'd see a councillor.

* * *

Harry is in almost all of Hermione's classes. Hermione wanted to sit next to Harry desperately but he would always move or he would be there before Hermione sitting with somebody else. Finally Hermione cornered him after there last class potions. Her was asked to stay back again by Professor Snape for answering back to him.

"Harry." Hermione said as Harry walked straight past Hermione. "Harry." Hermione said again this time he turned around.

"What?" Harry asked coldly.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked.

"What do you mean?" Harry was playing dumb and Hermione could tell… she hated that more than anything else in the world.

"You know perfectly well what I mean." Hermione stated.

"Look I told you last night… what happened between us didn't mean anything." Harry said.

"Well it meant something to me." Hermione said moving closer to him. "I am sure that it meant soothing to you." Hermione said and stopped right in front of him.

"No." Harry turned around but was only pulled back by Hermione again.

"Tell me Harry… tell me what's going on." Hermione said.

"Alright Hermione you want to know what's going on… I'll tell you. I love you… there I said it… and you know what's the worse part about it? I can't be with you that's why… I am scared of what will happen to you… I am scared on what will happen to Ron. All my friends have been hurt or someone they love has died because of me and I am not about to let that happen to you… … … … again." Harry said tears forming in his eyes. "So you need to fuck off and leave me alone alright." Harry spat as he wiped the fresh tears away and ran up the stairs. Leaving Hermione standing still processing what he just said.

* * *

A/N So what do you think? Thank you to my reviews. I would like to see more I love them. Any what do you want to see happen? I think it is interesting what people think. What do you think will happen? Please review even if it is bad. 


	5. Everything Gets Deeper

"So you need to fuck off and leave me alone alright." Harry spat as he wiped the fresh tears away and ran up the stairs. Leaving Hermione standing still processing what he just said.

* * *

"_Wow. Wasn't expecting that." _Hermione thought. Hermione walked up the stairs slowly. She didn't know whether she felt happy that Harry liked her or sad at the fact that he avoided her this whole time due to the fact that he was scared that he would hurt her. She needed time to think and talk… she needed to talk to someone. Ginny, was her best friend before the war and even though the have grown apart Hermione was sure Ginny would want to know. Hermione went to Gryffindor tower to find her, surely she would walk past after last period to put her books away, but she didn't walk past at all for and hour, Hermione went up to Ginny's room (which she should have done in the first place) and she wasn't there. Hermione grew worried and walked back down to the common room. People were sitting around doing homework playing games, but there was no Ginny. Hermione spotted the people Ginny usually hanged out with and walked over, she felt quite intimidated. They were just sitting in a bunch looking all 'cool' and depressed. They all seemed to wearing black and seemed to be very well covered… Hermione new the type of people they were.

"Hey." Hermione said but she was just ignored. "Hey." She said louder and got a few heads looking up at her. "Do you know were Ginny is?" Hermione asked.

"Nope." A young man replied, his eyes were red, is face pale he was wearing black from head to toe.

"Well have you seen her at all today?" Hermione asked again.

"Yep." He replied.

"Well, when." Hermione said more forceful.

"Transfiguration."

"And." Hermione was annoyed and getting one word answers but she was then ignored once again. "And where is she now?" Hermione asked abruptly.

"Don't know." The bog said very calmly.

"How can you not know she is your friend?" Hermione yelled, she was very concerned at the moment. "I mean what would happen if something happened to her?"

"Look… we don't keep tabs on people alright."

"She is most likely in the bathroom." A voice appeared. Hermione looked a young girl probably in third year was speaking. Long golden blonde hair, Hermione wondered how long that would stay that colour until it turned black. Awake shinning blue eyes, Hermione wondered how long until they were red and clean fresh arms, Hermione wondered how long until hidden by cuts. The young girl wearing black reminded Hermione of herself if it wasn't for Harry and Ron Hermione would probably be in that group all alone and only having them for comfort.

"Why is she in the bathroom?" Hermione asked questionably.

"Why does any of us go in the bathroom? Don't worry its her daily schedule and now I cut, you know the drill." They girl said.

"No I don't know the drill." Hermione said crossing her arms. "What bathroom?" Hermione demanded the answer.

"The Moaning Myrtle one… you know cause no one…" The young girl was cut off.

"Goes in there I know." Hermione took off like on speed.

Hermione was almost there until she felt that familiar hand on her shoulder whip her around and pull her into a classroom. He placed his cold lips on hers and forced his tongue between her lips. Hermione pulled away like she does every time only to revive a kick in the shin.

"Why are you like that." Hermione got defensive.

"Cause its fun." Draco went to kiss her again.

"Well not now ok…I have to do something." Hermione thought she would give that a chance to work her way out of it, after all the same thing happens all the time.

"You don't get to make the shots… I do." Draco spat.

"Ok… ok… ok…" Hermione said her guard was down.

"Now what should I do this time?" Draco whispered loud enough for Hermione to hear. "I know." Draco moved towards her and lifted her up on a desk. He separated her legs with great force and ran his hand up her leg.

"Wha… what are you doing." Hermione had tears forming in her eyes she was scared.

"Shh." Draco pulled down her pants from underneath her school skirt.

"Don't." Hermione yelled and tried to push him away only to have him push her down hard on the desk. One hand was on her stomach holding her down pushing into her pelvis and the other pushed two fingers inside her causing Hermione to scream in pain. Over and over again she told him to "Stop." And "Don't." But he wouldn't. when he was finally done he pulled his fingers out and shut her legs tight so her knees hit together painfully. He walked around the table to look Hermione in the eye he placed a hand on her face to wipe away the tears he had created. He pushed her off the table onto the floor and then he left.

Hermione laid there for a few moments before picking herself up and leaving all she could think of was Ginny. She once again cleaned herself up before going into the 'real world' once again. She finally made her way to the bathroom she was seeking only to find a crowed of teachers and students waiting outside. Hermione walked up to the crowed only to be told by Dumbledore to "Go back to your common rooms everybody give Mrs Weasley a little respect please." And with those words Hermione new something was wrong.

While the crowed went one way Hermione went the other only to discover Ron and Harry doing the same thing.

"Ron… Harry."

"I don't know." Ron said as the three of them walked up to Dumbledore and a few other teachers present.

"What's goin on here Sir?" Ron asked. "What happened to Ginny?"

"Ron, I think you should come with me to my office." Dumbledore said.

"No… what is it… is she ok." Ron voice became surprisingly concerned after having one emotion since the encounter with you-know-who and that was drunk and falling asleep.

"What's happened Dumbledore?" Hermione piped up afraid of the answer.

"Ok… Ginny was found tonight by Luna."

"And." Harry butted in.

"And… Ginny was found dead, she had cut her wrists and… well you know." Dumbledore said lightly. No one said a thing. Ron shook his head for a moment, turned around slowly punched the wall and walked away. Hermione couldn't breath, she literary couldn't breath.

"It's all my fault, It's all my fault, It's all my fault." She repeated while her knees buckled and she busted into hot tears that she was keeping in. Harry kneeled down beside her and hugged her.

"Shh." Harry repeated into her ear as Dumbledore entered into the bathroom with the other teachers. "Its not your fault, its not, come on shh." Harry helped her up as they walked off in the direction to the common room.

When they got there everyone was there waiting for them. The group that Hermione talked to earlier were still in the same position.

"So did you find her?" The young man said with a smile but this time he was the one that was ignored. "Wow, so she actually did it, can't say that any of us would have had the guts to."

"You new…" Hermione stopped in her tracks. "You new exactly wear she was, what she was doing and you acted like you didn't know." Hermione spat as tears rolled down her face, her face was steaming red. "How could you, you waisted my time, her TIME, why couldn't you have just told me when I asked you then I would have ran into Draco and would have found her before she killed herself. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Hermione yelled at the top of her voice as she flung out of Harry's arms and bounced on top of this young man slapping his face and screaming at him. Tears kept rolling down her face like a water fall. Hermione hands on her sides lifting her up off the ground and out the common room. Harry walked her through the school grounds and out to the black lake while she kicked and screamed "Put me down." And Harry finally put her down. Hermione landed on the grass with a bump curled her legs up against her chest and into a ball. It was now dusk and Harry sat done next to her.

"Hey come on please don't cry Mione." Harry said scratching his messy hair.

"It's really bad, I don't care if he kills me any more I feel like dying anyway, everything is so screwed up Harry its not funny." Hermione cried into her legs.

"Who's going to kill you?" Harry asked.

* * *

A/N Soooooo…. I know it's a little short but oh well. I almost cried writing this lol..

Please tell me what you think. PLEASE


	6. Naughty Little Secrets

"It's really bad, I don't care if he kills me any more I feel like dying anyway, everything is so screwed up Harry its not funny." Hermione cried into her legs.

"Who's going to kill you?" Harry asked.

* * *

"_Oh no I told… I am so stupid… what do I say… what do I say?" _Hermione thought through her knees. "No one."

"You mean Draco." Harry moves closer to Hermione as she pulled her head up to look at him.

"What?" Hermione was surprised.

"Draco is meaning to kill you isn't he… that's who you are talking about right?" Harry asked and he now was sitting right next to her.

"No… Not him… I was just being dramatic that's all." Hermione covered up.

"Well why did you run into him this afternoon? You yelled at that boy saying if it wasn't for him you wouldn't have ran into Draco and might have found Ginny before it was too late." Harry said looking at her while she just looked ahead.

"I did run into him… in fact I literally ran into him… and you know what Draco is like… he gave me a little bit of a scare that's all I promise… like I said I was just being dramatic." Hermione lied through her teeth. "I do feel to blame though if it wasn't from me I would have caught her out months ago and she wouldn't be dead." Hermione had fresh tears forming in her eyes.

"No…" Harry spoke. "If it's anyone to blame it's me. If it wasn't for me Ginny would still be alive. You know why she done this right? Her dad, Mr Weasley is dead because of me." Bitterness came across his voice. "If it wasn't for me your parents would be alive, Neville's Gran, I have hurt so many people." Harry chokes.

"Harry that's not true, you're not to blame." Hermione cuffed his face looking him in the eyes tears rolling down the side of her face.

"Oh no? Yes Hermione it's my entire fault, I went after Volemort and…" Harry was cut off.

"And we followed… we had a choice and we made it." Hermione plainly stated.

"If Mr Weasley didn't get killed looking for us Ginny wouldn't have been depressed and she would be still here with us." Harry pulled away from Hermione.

"Harry… Ginny had symptoms before her father died, it just triggered her depression." Hermione sighed.

"And your parents…" Harry whispered. "Hermione I am so… so… so sorry." Harry place one hand on Hermione hip and the other around her while gripping her into a hug and placing his head on her chest; and silently cried.

"Harry… I… its ok… its ok." Hermione said running her fingers through his messy hair while creating some new tears of her own.

* * *

After a while they had calmed down and had returned back to the castle about 9:30pm that evening. They didn't feel too hungry so they decided to go back up to the common room where they guessed many people would be waiting for them. They entered and no one was there, only the familiar red head siting in the corner staring at the fire. Both Hermione and Harry walked up to Ron and sat on the floor with him. His eyes were red, swollen and red. They didn't say anything for a few moments.

"How… how could she do… that… to herself?" Ron asked the two of them, while staring into the fire numbly.

"We don't know." Harry put a hand on Ron's shoulder only to have Ron brush it off.

"It's going to be ok Ron… your… we will get through this together." Hermione said softly.

"We? When has it ever been we Hermione? Where the hell were you too when my father died?" Ron spat. "Where the hell was that three of us the past 6 months? I tried talking to you Harry but you weren't completely there. Hermione you're criticising me all the time, and Ginny I watched her fade away." Ron yelled "I watched he slip through the fucking cracks." Ron whispered.

"Ron how could you've know what was going on, you were drunk or asleep most of the time." Hermione said.

"Oh Hermione I am not that stupid." Ron spat at Hermione as he began to get up while Harry and Hermione did the same. Ron faced Hermione and walked towards her pointing a finger in a rage. "She was my baby sister, if you think at all that I didn't notice her you are sadly mistaking, you know for someone so smart you can be stupid." Ron insulted her.

"Ron." Harry pulled Ron back away from Hermione.

"You know what; the two of you can get fucked… I don't need you I haven't needed you for six months… and where the hell were you this afternoon when we found out? I was here all alone going insane, Professor McGonagall ordered everyone to the rooms… where were you too then uh? Where were you too then?" Hermione and Harry didn't answer, they just stood there. "I loved my little sister with all my heart and for her…" Ron stopped to chock back some tears. "And for her to do what she did breaks my heart, its un real." Ron buried his face in his hand for a moment rubbing his eyes.

"Ron your mum… does she know yet." Harry asked.

"Fred and George went home and told her. She had a break down." Ron said Hermione walked towards Ron and gave him a big hug while Ron returned the hug and Harry joined in by patting Ron on the back. They all broke away from one another "I am sorry I lashed out at you guys."

"It's its ok." Hermione stated.

"From now on we talk about what's going on ok." Harry looked at Ron and Hermione receiving a nod from Ron and a "Sure" from Hermione she was clearly lying but Harry and Ron didn't notice a thing.

* * *

Hermione laid awake in her bed that night; she couldn't sleep. Her best friend had died and she was guilty that she wasn't a friend to her for the past six months. Draco has now violated her, and she had now lied to her friends; something she hated. Hermione tossed a turned in her bed trying hard to go to sleep but she kept finding herself imagining her parents being murdered and getting told the news of Mr Weasley's and Ginny's death. She sat up in her bed for a moment the one time she couldn't stand to be alone she decide to take a little walk to make her tired. She ended up finding herself at the entrance of Harry's bedroom door. She opened is ever so quietly and shut it behind her. She heard the loud snoring that Ron was creating while opening Harry's bed curtains and closing them behind her getting under the covers with Harry. She felt the bed move as she put all her weight on the bed waking Harry causing him to gasp as Hermione pressed her hand over his mouth.

"Shh… Harry is me." Hermione whispered.

"Hermione what are you doing here?" Harry whispered back in the dark trying hard to see her face but couldn't.

"I… I… couldn't sleep." Hermione's voice became a little embarrassed.

"Oh." Harry answered. Hermione put her head down on the pillow; she felt the awkwardness Harry was feeling. So she placed a hand on his chest only to realise he wasn't wearing a night shirt. She felt his muscles rise as he breathed and Hermione moved closer to him trying to find comfort… and there is was, Harry's arm was around her and placed safely on her hip pulling her closer to him. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead before the both of them fell asleep in each others arms… for once Hermione felt truly safe.

* * *

Hermione woke up all refreshed and alert only to realise that Harry wasn't lying right next to her. she checked her watch and it was 11am. She spun out of bed and ran to her room. She went to her cupboard to retrieve her school uniform she would wear today, she got dressed brushed her hair and was out of the door in a flash. She had Potions now, she rushed through the corridors and stair wells to the dungeons. She opened the door to have everyone turn around and look at her; clearly she will get a detention for "disturbing the class."

"Sorry I am late Professor I slept in." Hermione breathed as she walked in.

"Its fine Miss Granger, please take a seat." Professor Snape she politely, which was really unusual.

"Ok." Hermione said taking a seat in-between Harry and Ron who seemed like they had be saving it for her. Professor Snape went back to talking. "Why didn't you wake me?" Hermione whispered to Harry.

"You seemed so peaceful, I didn't wanna wake you, and besides you needed the sleep." Harry whispered back.

"Is he being nice or is it just me?" Hermione asked Harry and Ron.

"No he's being nice." Ron said.

"Yea, Dumbledore ordered every teacher to be nice to us and Ginny's friends for a couple days." Harry smiled.

"Oh." Hermione said as a big wooden ruler was hit on the table.

* * *

­­­­"Lunch." Harry said as the class was dismissed.

"Yea." Ron moaned.

"What do you mean yea?" Hermione said. "You love lunch its you favourite subject of the day."

"Yea, and it's the only subject I would see Ginny in." Ron said getting up and walked out.

The three of them made their way to the great hall. They got there and sat down at the table; they filled there plates, picked up a fork and that's went they realised that they weren't hungry. The three of them decided to pick and play at their food until Dumbledore came and sat opposite them.

"How are the three of you doing?" Dumbledore asked, but he just got three sad looks. "I see… Ron, son your mother has requested for you to go home fore a couple of weeks to hep with the funeral and all, you know help her out." Dumbledore said placing a piece of chicken on his mouth.

"Course, when do I go?" Ron said pushing his plate away altogether.

"Tonight." Dumbledore answered. "Oh and Mrs Weasley asked me to tell you too that she is really sorry but she only wants the family at the funeral, its all she can afford." Harry and Hermione's head dropped.

"Did you tell Mrs…" Harry was cut off.

"Yes I told her that you would be willing to pay, or even help her out but she said that she wanted to pay for her own daughters' funeral, the only thing she could pay for her, that's what she said." Dumbledore stated and Harry and Hermione understood. "I am giving the three of you permission… to have the rest of the day off, but I didn't just come down to tell you what I just did… no there is something else… about Ginny… ahh how do I say this… guys she was four months pregnant… having a little boy." And with those words Ron got up out of his sit.

"No that's not true." Ron spat at his head master. "My sister did not have sex." Ron yelled. "She's only 15 for heavens sake. Your wrong." Ron yelled.

"Ron I assure you, she was pregnant, to someone in this school."

"Too who? Cause if I find out who it is I am going to rip of that fucks dick off." Ron spat.

"Ron calm down." Hermione got up and embraced him around his waist. "Come on its ok."

"No its not, my sister is not a slut." Ron spat at Dumbledore.

"I am not saying that Ron." Dumbledore said.

"Fuck off I'm going home." Ron said pulling away from Hermione and walking out of the great hall. Dumbledore left soon after Ron did and finally Harry and Hermione heard the cutlery again.

"I'm going too." Hermione said as she got up.

"Where too?" Harry asked.

"I don't know… some place to think… pregnant Harry!" Hermione couldn't believe it. She walked out of the great hall, too the grounds and then to the black lake. She sat down in the same spot her and Harry were last night, she rested her back on a tree before hearing footsteps. She looked up and saw Draco there, he sat down next to her and before she had the chance to get up he had gripped her wrist.

"I heard about your friend." Draco smiled. "Ginny that's her name right? I called her Ninny, just like I call you Herm… it's a shame she killed herself, she was a good screw." Draco said slyly. "Too bad she got pregnant." He laughed.

"What?" Hermione said harshly.

"Aww didn't you know I was seeing other people… Herm your not that special." Draco said squeezing her wrist harder. "and if you tell any one what I said you'll be just like Ginny."

"You killed her." Hermione gasped.

"No... That's not my work… I wish it was." Draco snorted. "She was just a dirt little cut."

"No you did… you're the one that made her..." Hermione was cut off from the pain Draco was putting on her. "Let go… Draco that hurts… let go… I'll scream." Hermione raise her voice.

"You wouldn't dare." Draco said. "How did you like last night? Was I pleasurable enough for you?" Draco asked.

"Please let go, you're hurting me." Hermione said pulling up her wrist and trying you pry open her wrist from his grip.

"Whoops… time to go to class." Draco said as he let go of her wrist and slapped her on the face with the back of his hand. He got up and walked away leaving Hermione breathless and hurt.

* * *

She made her way back to the common room covering her badly bruised wrist with her school jumper. Harry was sitting forward on the couch alone by the fire place which wasn't burning.

"Where's Ron?" Hermione asked.

"You just missed him." Harry said in a low voice.

"Oh." Hermione walked towards Harry and sat down next to him.

"How long is this pain going to last?" Harry let out a breath.

"I don't know… I really don't know." Hermione let her tears fall down her face as Harry out his hand around her.

"It will be ok." He said trying to stay strong for her… but if only he truly new what Hermione was really crying about… Draco.

* * *

A/N What do you all think a about this? Thank u so much for my nice reviews- if anyone else was wondering what a K-mart is it is like a grocery store/clothes store (K-mart was motioned in chapter 2) any way thank you some much for reviewing.

Lots of words Karebear90


	7. The Confession Box

"It will be ok." He said trying to stay strong for her… but if only he truly new what Hermione was really crying about… Draco.

* * *

"_It's not fair, why won't he just leave me alone?" _Hermione thought as she placed her head gently on Harry's shoulder.

Harry and Hermione stayed in the common room all day only managing to see a few people between classes and that was because they forgot a book or was waging. Three a clock hit its mark and the common room started filling up, so Harry and Hermione decide to go up to Harry's room for privacy. They walked in when Harry said.

"It's not fair."

"What's not fair?" Hermione asked as she went and sat on his bed.

"Ginny… I can't believe it… how could she kill herself? I don't understand I mean, there are day I just wanna kill myself and I never go through with it… lack of courage I think." Harry joked. "She was brave… how could she?" Harry asked.

"I don't know." Hermione lied. "But I understand what you are saying, there are days for me as well where I wanna just… well you know, but then I think…" Hermione thought… what is there to loose? Her parents are dead, Ginny is dead and Draco is abusing her, she wouldn't be missing much. "I think that I deserve to live… it's my life and I don't wanna die yet…" Hermione was cut off.

"And Ginny wanna to die now." Harry said.

"No she was driven to it." Hermione gasped.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked.

"That came out wrong… what I meant to say was… someone who is depressed is determined to kill themselves sometimes." Hermione covered up as there came a knock at the door. Harry walked over and revealed Lavender.

"Is Ron here?" She asked.

"No… he left… he has gone home for about two weeks." Harry answered; she looked around the room until her eyes became fixated on Hermione sitting on Harry's bed.

"What is she doing here?" Hermione heard Lavender whisper to Harry.

"Ahh." Harry muttered as he looked back at Hermione.

"I thought we had something going here?" Lavender said.

"We do I am not saying we don't." Harry stated.

"Then why haven't you come and seen me?"

"I have had a lot to deal with." Harry said in a low voice that Hermione could still hear.

"Are you seeing her?" Lavender asked.

"What? Hell no, why would you think that?" Harry asked shocked.

"Because you are spending all your time with her." Lavender proclaimed.

"That doesn't mean a thing." Harry growled.

"Well I have needed you Harry." Lavender said in a seductive tone.

"Ahh." Harry shivered. "You have to go…" Harry gasped as she reached down to his genital area.

"Aww Harry." Lavender winged.

"Go." Harry whispered as he gently pushed the door closed.

Harry turned around to see Hermione standing up with her arms crossed.

"What's with Lavender?" Hermione said with bitterness.

"What? Nothing why?" Harry said a little higher then he normally would.

"Harry, I heard… I saw her touching you… Harry that's Ron's girlfriend…" Hermione was cut off.

"So what he doesn't notice her… she is just a good screw for him." Harry blurted out.

"You're seeing her… Harry how could you? I thought that…. Oh neer mind what I thought... I suppose I was your next screw wasn't I?" Hermione spat as she walked towards the door.

"Hermione that is not true I have never had sex with her." Harry pleaded for Hermione to stay.

"All guys are the same." Hermione said as she reached for the door handle.

"What is that meant to mean?" Harry asked but Hermione didn't answer. "Hermione." Harry asked as he grabbed her left wrist, the one Draco had injured causing Hermione to yell out in pain. "What is it Hermione?" Harry asked as he pulled up her wrist.

"Don't Harry please." Hermione said tears forming in her eyes, she didn't want to pull away, because she was afraid of causing herself more pain. Harry pulled Hermione's arm over and slowly slid up her jumper revealing a very badly bruised wrist.

"Hermione what happened?" Harry gasped.

"I had an accident." Hermione covered.

"How?" Harry asked.

"I…" Hermione couldn't take it. "Draco did it." Hermione finally said she felt a great weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

"What?" Harry was stunned Hermione walked back to the bed.

"Harry you must promise me, Harry please… promise me you won't tell anyone please." Hermione pleaded as Harry came and sat down next to her.

"I promise." Harry said placing a hand on her knee causing Hermione to jump in pain once more, and she revealed a purple bruise on her thigh. "Hermione what the hell is he doing to you?"

"Ever since forth year Draco has been… beating me up every chance he got." Hermione said as quickly as she could. "Hitting me, kicking me you name it Harry… and this past week he has just started sexually…" Hermione was cut off by a raging Harry.

"His raped you?" Harry yelled.

"No, not yet… but I am scared Harry I am scared that he will… yesterday before I found out about Ginny." Hermione was cut off again.

"You ran into him." Harry said.

"Yes... Harry please let me finish." Hermione pleaded and Harry nodded. "He… this is really hard for me to say… but he fingered me last night… oh god." Hermione bent over clutching her eyes as if acid was purled into them.

"Her what?" Harry screamed.

"That's why I was late." Hermione said sitting up.

"That's it we have to tell Dumbledore..." Harry said getting up and walking to the door swiftly.

"No Harry. You can't… please Harry you promised." Hermione said pulling him back.

"Well what am I meant to do Hermione… sit here and watch him." Harry stopped.

"Yes Harry you must… I have gone through this on my own for two years Harry please… you can't, what I need from right now, is to be here for me please Harry…" Hermione desperately scanned his eyes for the answer she was seeking and it came.

"I won't say a word… but if you ever need someone to bail you out at any stage or if you need me I am here ill always be hear for you Mione. Come here." Harry said walking towards her and embracing her into a hug. Harry and Hermione went back to the bed to talk.

"Harry."

"Yea." Harry said.

"Ginny… I know who the father was." Hermione said looking at him.

"Who…" Harry said surprised but then he saw Hermione's face. "Oh no… no…no…no" Harry said.

"Yea… its draco… I didn't know… he was abusing her too… and that's what I think made her so depressed." Hermione said tears once again forming in her eyes.

"That SON OF A BITCH." Harry yelled getting up and kicking the wall. "And you want me keeping this a secret?" Harry said with him back towards her."

"Yes… otherwise he'll kill me Harry… you know that he is capably of doing it… you know that he has connections… Harry please." Hermione walked up to him and slip her hands around his waist.

"Ok. Ok" Harry said puling away from her.

"Harry Lavender?" Hermione said she wanted to know what was going on.

"She likes me… always has… she was having sex with Ron… that's all Ron was…" Harry sighed.

"Do you like her?" Hermione asked.

"No I would never like her… lets just say she is too easy… I wouldn't want to catch anything." Harry laughed but got a stern look from Hermione. "What?" Harry joked.

"Nothing." Hermione laughed. "I'm hungry." Hermione stated.

"Me too." Harry said taking Hermione's hand while waking down to dinner.

* * *

A/N wow thanks to my reviews hehe … what did you think about this chapter?? I was just tying up a few loose ends… lots of words karebear90 


	8. Hush Hush

"Nothing." Hermione laughed. "I'm hungry." Hermione stated.

"Me too." Harry said taking Hermione's hand while waking down to dinner.

* * *

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­"_Something is different." _Hermione thought at she and Harry sat side by side at dinner eating a roast and hearing the occasional burp come out of Neville who sat across the table. It was funny… even though the hall was packed with students Hermione felt it was bare… Ron wasn't there.

"I have to pee." Hermione said to Harry getting up and leaving to go to the toilet. She walked into the bath room and did her business, she went to wash her hands and looked up into the mirror, she saw her face… it was happy in a way, her eyes were still droopy and she still had lost a great deal of weight, and the bruises that Draco had created were dulling down, she smiled at herself and walked out only to be pushed back in by that familiar hand, closing the door behind him.

"Hi." His voice echoed in the bathroom.

"What do you want?" Hermione said backing away.

"What I have always wanted. Have you thought about the bargain? You have sex with me and I'll leave you alone… or do I have to take it from you and I won't leave you alone?"

"You can get fucked…" Hermione spat at him… "Leave me the hell alone." Hermione barged passed him to the door only to feel a hand on her shoulder pull her back. She turned around to face and caught a punch on her mouth, she stumbled backwards to the door clutching her mouth.

"What did you say to me?" Draco walked towards her.

"N-nothing." Hermione shivered.

"That's better…" Draco said pushing her to the ground unlocking the door. "Oh and you need to get fucked, you dirty mudblood." Draco said walking out of the bathroom.

Hermione got up off the bathroom floor uttering the words. "Who would want to fuck a dirty little mudblood anyway…?" She go up and went to the mirror, her lip was busted. She got a piece of toilet paper and cleaned it only to have the wound fill up with blood once more, so she pressed her lips together to hide it.

She reached back to the table; she saw that Harry was having a very interesting conversation with Neville about water pansies. She sat silently back down next to him and felt his hand around her waist.

"Hey." Harry turned to look at her, and Hermione didn't say a word afraid of showing her cut. "What up?" Harry asked and Hermione just shook her head. "Mione." Harry said looking her once again in the eyes, and that is when Hermione new she couldn't hide it any longer. She un pressed her lips and saw Harry's face. "What happened?" Harry asked but Hermione didn't say anything she just looked at Draco sitting across the hall talking and laughing with his mates and Hermione sighed.

"That's it." Harry said getting up and walking down the table.

"Harry." Hermione yelled after him only causing a few heads to turn. "Harry stop." Hermione said getting up herself. Harry was already around the table and making his way up to Draco. Hermione picked up her speed into a light jog and she felt herself pull on Harry's arm. "Harry don't please… Harry." Hermione pleaded. Harry turned around to look at her.

"Hermione let me go." Harry said gritting his teeth together.

"No Harry please." Hermione said but Harry wouldn't hear it, he ripped his hand out of her grip and stormed the rest of the way to Draco. He reached Draco with Hermione by his side.

"Get up you coward." Bitterness came across Harry's voice as he spoke to Draco.

"What… pot head?" Draco said coming out of his own little world.

"I said get up." Harry repeated.

"That's better… thought that you just called me a coward." Draco said as he got up out of his seat.

"That's it." Harry said knocking some sense into him by punching Draco in the face, only until Draco returned the favour by doing the same and before Hermione new both Draco and Harry were on the floor punching and cursing at each other as if one of them were a bull and the other was riding…but changing.

"Harry stop it… Harry please… stop it… Draco this is all my fault I am sorry… Harry please." Hermione cried tears welling in her eyes.

"What the hell is going on here." A familiar cold voice appeared. "Get off one another at once." Professor Snape said plucking Harry off Draco. "Well?" Professor asked as he held onto the back of Harry's collar as Draco got up.

"He started it professor… I was here minding my own business and he comes alone and punches me in the face." Draco proclaimed.

"Is that true?" Professor Snape asked Harry. Harry was about to open his mouth but then saw the look on Hermione face… her face was wet from where the tears had rolled down her face and in her eyes Hermione was begging him not to say anything.

"Yea… that's true; it was just a teenage angst moment." Harry said as Professor Snape let go of him.

"Ok well… I'll let you two off with a warning… and I you expect that there will be no recurring situations… now you Mr Potter you go one way and Mr Malfoy the other if you please." The boys looked at one another before Harry saw Draco give Hermione a dirty look, then he saw that everyone was crowded around; every eye upon him. He slowly made his way out of the great all with Hermione by his side.

Harry and Hermione turned the corner before as soon as Hermione pushed him against the wall. "What the hell was that…? Harry he knows that I told..." Hermione said pressing his shoulder against the wall.

"I am sorry… but you don't deserve what he does to you." Harry said pulling her hands off his shoulders and placing them in his hands down by his sides. Hermione looked down tears welling in her eyes. "We should tell Dumbledore." Harry stated.

"No… Harry please you know what he is capable of… he has the death eaters… you-know-who and his Father. Harry he has connections… I shouldn't have told you." Hermione said pulling away from Harry until Harry grabbed her hands once more.

"Look at me…" Harry asked Hermione who was looking away from his gaze. "Hermione look at me." Hermione looked at him tears streaming down her face. "You did the right thing telling me ok? Hermione you can trust me. I promise you nothing like that will ever happen again ok?" Hermione nodded her head and wrapped her hands around his waist and pressed into a hug and Harry was more than happy to receive it.

Both Harry and Hermione had returned to there normal classes for the rest of the week without Ron… it was now Friday and Ron hadn't owled them.

"Maybe we should write." Hermione suggested.

"And say what Hermione? Oh hey Ron we were just wondering how you are doing with the funeral… oh and lets just add how is your mother copping with the news Ginny was pregnant? Yea real cheerful… Hermione." Harry said sitting on his bed.

"You don't have to talk to me like that I was only saying… I am just as worried about Ron and Mrs Weasley as you are." Hermione snapped.

"Sorry I didn't mean to. I am just stressed." Harry said getting up from his be and placing his hand on Hermione's hips.

"It's ok." Hermione said in a soft voice.

"Its just real hard you know… everything that I have taken in this week." Harry said looking her in the eye.

"I know." Hermione said in a soothing voice.

They looked at one another for a moment until Harry tilted his head slightly but then moved away ever so fast.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked the back of Harry.

"Nothing." Harry said turning around.

"Then come here." Hermione said pulling on Harry school tie and pulling him towards her. She pressed her lips gently on his feeling him relax in her arms as he placed his on her hips once more. Harry opened his mouth a little for Hermione to enter… and so she did over and over again. They heard a knock at the door and they both let out a frustrated moan.

"I'll get it." Harry said pushing Hermione to the side and opening the door. "Neville what's up?" Harry asked.

"Nothing much Harry I was just bored… thought I'd come and see you… talk to you about talking turnips I hear that's they are in season." Neville said showing Harry a book about all different type of turnips… while hearing the occasional giggle come out of Hermione.

"I am sure that it is very interesting and all but Neville I am not that interested in this type of stuff." Harry said.

"Well Harry I am sure that you would love to learn more about talking turnips." Hermione giggled as she appeared at the door.

"Oh Hermione I didn't know you were here." Neville said sheepishly.

"No I was just leaving." Hermione said pecking Harry on the cheek. "I'll see you later Harry." Hermione flirted.

"But…" Harry was cut off.

"Bye." Hermione walked down the stairs and all the way back to her room she was feeling better… she was smiling and her heart was big. Although she was still upset about Ginny, her parents and Draco she some how felt happy… life finally she was wanted again. She walked in her room, got into clothes that she was comfortable in and made her was back to Harry's room. Hermione knocked on the door three times before Neville opened his door on the other side of the hall.

"Harry's not there." Neville said in his blue night clothes.

"Do you know where he is?" Hermione asked.

"Hillers… he goes there every Friday night… every since you know the war and all." Neville said shutting his door. Hermione stood there for a moment and was surprised that Harry went there every Friday night…

Hermione made her way down to Hillers and knocked on the back door…

"Hermione… what are you doing here by your self?" George asked.

"I am not here by myself Harry here." Hermione said.

"True…" George said.

"He told me to meet him here." Hermione lied. "How are you?"

"I am doing ok… its Fred I am worried about… he won't stop… on his feet all day and all night… but enough about that… in you go." George said as he ushered Hermione in.

She walked to the spot were Fred was working across the space, Hermione sat on an empty stool on at the bar and waited for Fred to come.

"Hermione what are you doing here? What would you like?" Fred asked.

"Nothing… I was wondering have you seen Harry." Hermione asked.

"Yea I have… turn around." Fred said. Hermione turned around and saw Harry dancing quite lustful with Lavender Brown. His hands were all over her… she was kissing him. Hermione felt a lump being created in her throat and stomach had butterflies in it, tears welling in her eyes… she was hurt… "That Jerk." Hermione yelled.

* * *

A/N What do you think? Hehe thank you to my reviews again… oh I am sorry that it took me a long time to write… I am on holidays and have been going out a lot... school starts soon … eek it's my last year… so wish me luck... lots of words Karebear. 


	9. Coming Out

Hermione felt a lump being created in her throat and stomach had butterflies in it, tears welling in her eyes… she was hurt… "That Jerk." Hermione yelled.

* * *

_Stupid, stupid Hermione… stupid, stupid." _Hermione thought as she ripped opened her bedroom door. Her face stained with tears as she fell to the floor holding her stomach. She cried hard "How could he… what was I thinking." Hermione cried to herself while rocking.

* * *

Hermione made her way down to breakfast but found herself not wanting to eat anything as soon as she saw that Harry was there, so she decide that she would go down to see Hagrid. As she was walking down the familiar hill she felt that same cold hand grab her and drag her behind a tree. 

"Slut." Draco said slapping her. "Filthy." Draco said again slapping but on the other said of the face while Hermione gasped. "Bitch." Once again he slapped her on the opposite side of the face. "Dirty filth." He said and once more slapped her for the fourth time.

"I… I… I'm sorry I didn't mean to… he wouldn't listen." Hermione said trying to pry away from Draco who was holding her shirt.

"No your not… I told you that if you told you would have to face the consequences…" Draco was cut off.

"And what is that?" Hermione asked.

"Look at Ginny." Draco said.

"She killed herself." Hermione stated.

"My point exactly." Draco spat at Hermione in the face and walked away from her.

Hermione slid down the tree to the ground trying to catch her breath from holding it. What was she going to do? She couldn't tell anyone else, she couldn't talk to Harry, she trusted Harry and now look at what has happened.

Hermione couldn't go to Hagrid's now her face was red so she decided to go up to her room. On her way passing the great hall she bumped into no other than Mr Harry Potter.

"Hermione." Harry said while Hermione pretended that she didn't see or hear Harry. "Hermione." Harry repeated as Hermione stopped in her tracks and slowly turned around. "Hermione shit." Harry said in a concerned voice as he saw her face.

"Its fine, it's only red." Hermione reassured Harry as he can up to her he went to touch her face for a better look but Hermione quickly pulled away from his reach.

"Are you ok?" Harry asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Hermione answered with a question.

"I don't know. I seem kinda angry with me… are you?" Harry asked again.

"Do I have a reason to be angry with you?" Hermione asked with bitterness crossing her arms.

"I don't know… but I can tell that you are angry with me because of your body stance." Harry gestured.

"Well you just answered your question didn't you?" Hermione said as she turned her back and started to walk away but was confronted with Harry's running around and making her stop.

"What is that mean to mean?" Harry was confused.

"I am angry with you." Hermione yelled at him.

"Why." Harry asked.

"Two words… Lavender Brown." Hermione said and Harry was taken aback. "What?"

"You heard me." Hermione said. "I saw you two last night at Hillers… so don't you deny it."

"Saw us what? We were dancing that's all." Harry confessed.

"Bullshit… I think that you two do more than just dance." Hermione said.

"Hermione… can we take this some other place please?" Harry lowered his voice.

"Why? Don't you want people to know that you and Lavender are together?" Hermione yelled out for people to hear but know one was there.

"Come on." Harry said pulling her sleeve and ushering her into an empty classroom. "Lavender and I are not together." Harry said.

"Bull." Hermione said. "Look if you dragged me in here just to tell me that you too aren't together then you two can have each other."

"Hermione don't be like that. What do you want to hear? Oh Hermione I am sorry I lead you on but I am with Lavender? Do you want to hear that?" Harry yelled and there was no answer from Hermione. "You don't want to hear that… and you don't want to hear me saying that Lavender and I are not together what the hell do you want to hear?" Harry asked.

"I don't know what I want to here." Hermione said. "All I want to here is you not lying." Hermione stated.

"Well I am not lying… I am not with Lavender." Harry said.

"That's complete and utter bull and you know it Harry James Potter. I saw you with her; I saw her kissing you I saw where your hands were on her." Hermione said.

"Hermione you don't…" That's all Hermione heard when she walked out the door.

* * *

She made her way back to the Gryffindor common room and up to her bedroom to where she spent all day there until morning. She only had a few sweets in her room to tie her over until she got really hungry for brunch. She sat down at the Gryffindor dinning table once again across from where Neville was sitting occasionally burping every five minutes. 

"What you do to Harry?" Neville randomly asked Hermione after she had poured herself a cup of orange juice.

"Excuse me?" Hermione was confused was Neville talking to her?

"What did you do to Harry?" Neville asked again.

"Nothing." Hermione said.

"Are you sure because you are the only one that he spends time with now and he bit my head off last night…" Neville said.

"Neville… what ever Harry does is none of my business, he is a big boy and his actions have nothing to do with me." Hermione stated.

"Well I just thought…" Neville was cut off but a rude Hermione.

"Well you thought wrong like you do most of the time." Hermione said picking up a piece of toast and leaving. Hermione was walking in one of the corridors when she felt that familiar hand push her into the wall really hard… Hermione turned quickly to see where the next hit was coming to but Draco was walking away with his mates. Hermione let out a breath and kept walking. She found herself at the library a place she hasn't been in a while... she has read almost every book in it… but she just like it because it was peaceful and there was a adult there to keep an eye on her.

* * *

Hermione walked into the common room about six pm and wondered why everyone wasn't at dinner… every one was doing there own thing until Hermione walked in everyone went silent and Lavender walked out of the crowed and cam e fact to face with her. 

"You Bitch." Lavender said slapping Hermione on the face it seemed to feel harder than what Draco did yesterday but Hermione didn't know because it was healing.

"What was that for?" Hermione asked.

"Harry just told me we couldn't be friends anymore" Lavender said. "Because of you."

"What?" Hermione said.

"Yea… look bitch… you stay away from my friends or else alright… just because you don't have friends any more doesn't mean you that you can steal mine." Lavender said coldly.

"Harry what the hell." Hermione said as Harry walked down the stairs and as the whole room turned to look at him.

"Uh?" Harry said.

"You bite off Neville's head and he blames it on me and you break up with Lavender and she blames it on me." Hermione said.

"WE ARE NOT GOING OUT." Harry yelled at Hermione from across the room.

"Well apparently not any more." Hermione said.

"Oh my gosh will you get over yourself." Harry said as he walked towards her. "I don't know what bloody world you are living in but it's not mine. And if your acting like this maybe we shouldn't be together." Harry said.

Hermione ears burst… what he say?

"What?" Hermione lowered her voice.

"I said if you can't trust me maybe we shouldn't be together. I can't do the drama." Harry said.

"That's not what you said." Hermione stated.

"It's what I meant." Harry said coldly.

"Oh my god this is too much for me in one night and I wanted to come out any way I am a lesbian ok." Lavender confessed. "I have known for awhile and people have started up rumours saying I was and I wasn't ready for people to know… so I asked Harry if he would be seen with me and he suggested Hillers on the weekends and it was better than nothing cause I new that some people from school goes there and then they would see me with a guy and wouldn't question my sexuality anymore." Lavender finished with a huff.

There was an awkward silence until a noisy red head came barging through the door holding a suit case and wearing a very colourful shirt.

"I'm back… I am feeling much…" Ron stopped at all the people staring at him. "Better." He finished.

Harry and Hermione told everyone that the show was over and they could go to dinner and so they did.

"You could have told me that there was a welcoming home party for me." Ron joked as he put his stuff down in the empty common room.

"Look I am going to dinner." Lavender said trying to get Ron's attention to go with her.

"Ohh me too I am starving." Ron said ad going with Lavender.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Hermione asked.

"Because… like you Lavender wants things kept as secrets." Harry said.

"I am sorry." Hermione said with tears in her eyes.

"Hey come on its ok. You just have to promise me one thing ok?" Harry said.

"What's that?" Hermione asked.

"Apologise to Neville." Harry smiled.

"I will." Hermione said has Harry embraced her with a hug.

* * *

A/N what ya think hehe… thank you so much to all my reviews they are so nice I love them hehe… lots of words karebear90 


	10. Anywhere But Here

"What's that?" Hermione asked.

"Apologise to Neville." Harry smiled.

"I will." Hermione said has Harry embraced her with a hug.

* * *

­­­­­"_Wow. Didn't see that coming." _Hermione thought about Lavender. She felt so bad how she treated Harry as she walked up to him early Sunday morning in the Gryffindor common room.

"I just said I was sorry to Neville." Hermione said sitting on the couch that Harry was sitting on and wrapping her arms around Harry only so he'd take them off.

"Hermione we need to talk." Harry said and Hermione didn't like the tone of his voice.

"Why what is it?" Hermione was taken aback.

"It's about Lavender." Harry said.

"Oh Harry can we drop it… I was right and you were wrong I know." Hermione said once again putting her arms around him only so he pulled them off again.

"No… you were right and I am wrong." Harry said.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"Lavender is a lesbian…" Harry was cut off.

"And." Hermione butted in.

"And I am in love with her." Harry blurted out.

"What?" Hermione was surprised.

"I am in love with her… and I used you to try and get over her but I couldn't… the reason why I asked you to Hillers last week is because I just found out that Lavender was a lesbian… she just told me you see… because she didn't want to lead me on any more. And I new that you liked me so…" Harry was cut off again.

"So you used me." Hermione was angry hurt confused but one thing she didn't want at that moment is for the tears to start and they did.

"Yes and I am sorry. Do you know how bad the feeling is when you girlfriend leaves you for another girl? Trust me it's not good on the ego. So I had to prove to my self that I am not broken or something and I could have a non lesbian girl friend..." Harry said… Hermione now had tears rolling down her face, all she wanted to here was that Harry loved her she didn't care that he loved some one as well all she cared about is if he loved her and that's it. "Hermione I don't love you…" and there it was. "Not the way I love Lavender your like a baby sister to me." Harry said.

"Oh god." Hermione let out a wail of tears, got up and ran away. She ran as fast as she could anywhere but here she kept on thinking. Finally she found herself bent over the toilet seat throwing up what little food she has eaten. She walked out of the cubical and saw what bathroom she was in Ginny's. Hermione felt all cold _"What's the point?" _Hermione thought. _"Mum and Dad are dead…My best friend is dead… Harry doesn't love me and Draco won't stop hurting me… what's the point… I'm gonna die any way." _Hermione thought once again.

She picked up a rock that was on the deserted bathroom floor, wondering what a rock was doing in there she threw it at the mirror and shattered it into pieces. She picked up a piece of glass and rested it on her wrist for a moment. _"I have been through worse pain with Draco."_ She thought as she pressed the piece of glass into her wrist. She let out a gasp as blood poured out of her skin while she did it again and again and again.

Soon she couldn't see her arm any more; it was drenched in blood and deep cuts. She fell to the ground because she couldn't handle standing and in a few minutes she felt dizzy. She held her head until she felt herself feel the cold marble floor press against her face as she slipped away from the world.

* * *

A/N that's it every body…. What did you think? I want to say thank you to every one that read my story and I think that I have improved in my English lol… hopefully my English teacher will see it… Umm keep and eye out for my other stories… it u like… and yea I will be starting another story soon… don't know what it is called but it will be a Harry and Ginny fic kk… well thanks to everyone once again 31 reviews… no make that 32 I just got another one wow… thanks… lots of words from Karebear90 


	11. What He Wants To Say

Soon she couldn't see her arm any more; it was drenched in blood and deep cuts. She fell to the ground because she couldn't handle standing and in a few minutes she felt dizzy. She held her head until she felt herself feel the cold marble floor press against her face as she slipped away from the world.

* * *

"_Where am I? What have I done?" _Hermione heard her familiar thoughts erupt in her head as she tried to pry her eyes open. She was cold all over, except her right hand… it was warm. She blinked her eyes open and saw the messy black headed boy she once loved resting his head her bed asleep at her side. She looked around at the room for a moment, and saw the familiar paintings on the wall fast asleep. She moved up in the bed so she was sitting and looked down at her arm and saw it wrapped in bandages. "What did I do?" Hermione whispered to herself as she ripped her had out of Harry's…

Harry moved a little in his sleep and the chair that he was sitting on it buckled underneath him causing him to fall to the ground and waking himself up.

"I'm up… I'm up." Harry said springing up onto his feet.

"Good to see." Hermione heard her voice.

"Hermione…" Harry said rushing towards the bed.

"Harry… don't ok… I still remember what you said." Hermione said looking away.

"Hermione I don't care about that anymore… what I care about is you… why you would do something like that to yourself?" He said with great concern.

"Who cares what I do to myself… if I had my way would be dead right now…" bitterness can across her voice. "And let me guess you found me?" Hermione asked.

"Yes I did… Hermione I was so scared… Hermione I…" Harry was cut off.

"I don't care what you have to say… I just want you to leave…" Hermione said with her arms crossed.

"What?" Harry was confused.

"You heard me… leave GET OUT OF HERE." Hermione screamed.

"Ok … ok." Harry said picking up a bag from the floor and walked out.

Hermione laid in the same spot for about five minutes until she couldn't stand the pain anymore... she let out a bunch of air and cried into her hands.

* * *

Hermione was released from the hospital a few days later… and was excused from classes for a further few days… but Hermione being Hermione didn't plan on missing any more school work since she decide that she was going to live.

"And the formula for…" Professor Snape was cut off by Hermione appearance at the door. "Miss Granger you are late." He said in a cold voice.

"I know." She replied while everyone in the class was staring at her… obviously they all heard of her suicide attempt.

"Well… take a seat… and don't make a habit of it." He said and Hermione wondered what he truly meant while she took a seat and chose Ron over Harry. "Ok where was I? Oh yes…" Professor Snape continued teaching his class while Ron and Hermione started having there own private chat.

"You're not meant to be in class till Friday." Ron proclaimed.

"I know." Hermione whispered.

"Are you ok?" Ron asked.

"Ronald!! If I wasn't ok would I be here?" Hermione snapped.

"Guess not." Ron pipped down.

"How was the funeral?" Hermione asked quickly changing the subject as Harry moved seats; right in front of Hermione behind Professor Snape's back.

"It was ok… Mum was really happy that she paid for it herself… you know" Ron said.

"Yea I know." Hermione said.

"Hermione… Hermione" Harry whispered trying to get her attention but Hermione chose to ignore it. "Hermione." Harry said a little louder. "Hermione" Harry said at normal voice level.

"Yes Mr Potter?" Professor Snape said.

"No I wasn't…" Harry was cut off.

"You were disrupting my class." The cold professor said.

"No I wasn't I was simply saying…" Harry was lost for words.

"You were simply saying… yes sir I will be glad to stay after class for detention." Professor Snape informed Harry that he just received detention.

"Yes sir."

"Now I can get back to my class." He said turning away from Harry.

"Pist… Hermione." Harry continued but Hermione persisted on ignoring him… until he had placed an envelope on her desk as the class was dismissed.

* * *

All day Hermione spent the majority of her class time fixated on the envelope Harry had given her… until she was tucked away in her favourite corner of the common room. She sat on the arm chair staring into the fire… she was afraid of what was written in it… she didn't want to read the word sorry she didn't want to read anything from that jerk… but she was also curious what was written. Should she through it into the fire and be done with it? Be done with Harry? Or open it and read what he wants to say? Slowly she opened the back of the envelope and let the open just sit there for awhile… then she pulled out the piece of paper that was inside. She placed the envelope on the arm of the arm chair and placed the folded letter on her lap. After staring at the white piece of paper for about five minutes she finally plucked up the courage, picked it up, opened it and read.

_Dearest Hermione;_

_The reason why you are reading this is because I couldn't get your attention, I was too chicken to come up to you and say this for myself or you wouldn't let me. But if I had to pick any of those reasons it would be because I am too chicken. _

Hermione let out a giggle.

_Hermione!! I am sorry… I know you don't want to hear this… well read that… but I am. When I found you, I had never felt such loss, such pain in my life… no, not even the physical pain that I have been put though. Hermione I was wrong to dismiss you… and I have found my true feelings towards you… I have had them here all along… but never new how to pursue them. Hermione I am dreadfully sorry for all the things I said and did and if I could turn back time, I would… but I'll still be there and won't be able to change it. Please Hermione… please forgive me… but I don't blame you if you don't. Please meet me at the owlery at 9:00pm tonight… even it you haven't forgiven me… heck you can just come to punch me in the face if you want. But Hermione no matter what… ok … I am really sorry and… I love you. _

_Love Harry. _

Hermione folded the piece of paper to its original creasing and through it in the fire.

* * *

A/N I have decided to re-open this story because people are really UN happy on how I was going to end it… the reason why I was going to end so early because I thought I was dragging the story out a bit (I thought you guys were getting bored of it) and so I thought I would end it there, but that's not the case… so I have re-opened it… but I warn you… I won't be as fast posting because I am due to be back at school in about a week and it will take me longer to write cause I won't have enough time too… but ill keep on writing :) no hard feelings… lots of words karebear90 


	12. Just Tenderness

Hermione folded the piece of paper to its original creasing and through it in the fire.

* * *

"_If he thinks for one second that I am just gunna rush up and see him and forgive him he is sadly mistaking." _Hermione thought.

"Hermione do you wanna play exploding snap with me?" Ron asked as he appeared in the room.

"Sorry Ron I have something to do." Hermione said as she walked out the door. Soon Hermione found herself walking up the owlery stairs. Saying to herself "Why am I doing this." She opened the door to find Harry sitting at the window.

"Hermione." He looked up at her and walked towards her. "I thought you weren't coming."

"I wasn't." Hermione said crossing her arms.

"Hermione I…"

"Shut up Harry James Potter." Hermione said.

"Ok that's a good idea." Harry said swinging on his feet.

"I love you there is no doubt about it… but if you ever hurt me again…" Hermione was cut off.

"I won't I promise." Harry said.

"Good… cause I have wanted to do this for a while now." Hermione said pressing her lips on his.

"I love you." Harry whispered in her ear as they broke into a hug. "I am so… so sorry."

And with those words Hermione took back Harry…. Whether they stayed together is another story.

Ron finally got a girl friend that wasn't a lesbian and is currently going to rehab for his alcohol addiction… his mother found it in the muggle world.

Neville's Aunt and Uncle split up and Neville decided to live with his Uncle that means no more diets.

Mrs Weasley still works as a check out chick but now also works under cover at the ministry.

Fred and George are fine but have to deal with Jerry every night… it's a record a month at Hillers.

* * *

A/N and thus it is over…. Is that a better ending? Lots or words Karebear90 


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